When? How? Where? These were the only questions running through Hannah's mind. All she could think about was how she was going to tell Victor. What would he think of her afterward? Would he stop loving her? Would he ignore her? Would he even believe her?
Who in their right mind would believe someone when they say they've come from the future to try and make a romantic connection? No one, right?
She didn't know exactly how much time she had, but she definitely knew it wasn't long. The time she had told her parents was going to end soon, and she would have to go back. Everything here seemed perfect, like she now had everything she had ever asked for. But if she didn't tell him soon and then disappeared later when the time came, he might hate her forever. And who wouldn't, right? It almost felt like she was being too selfish. She did all this so she could experience this silly love she had imagined, and it all seemed so unfair for Victor because he had never asked or wished for this.
Now he had to go through all this pain just because Hannah wasn't responsible enough, and this could probably end up with him hating Hannah forever, which seemed even more horrible than him never noticing her. She couldn't fathom the thought of Victor hating her. She would have been fine with seeing and admiring him from a distance and being invisible to him rather than him despising her forever.
Prom was right around the corner, and letters and bouquets were going around the school. People were asking each other to be their dates, and couples were breaking up. All the student committee members were busy figuring out the theme and preparations for the dance.
"Hey, Hannah."
"Yeah?"
"Do you want to go to the park today?"
"Uh, sure, but why? We can stay in and watch something."
"Ahh, we do it all the time. You should really go out. You need some fresh air, or else you will become a vampire."
"Well, wouldn't it be so cool to tell your friends that you have a vampire as your girlfriend?"
"Please, can we go?"
"Ahhh, okay, if you insist so much. Yeah, we can go breathe the just as polluted air."
"You can never let me have the final word, can you?"
"What can I do? You picked me."
"Well, I wouldn't have it any other way, sweetie."
"Vic?"
"What are your plans after high school?"
"Well, I'm going to go to university for music and probably apply for some agency, and I will get married to you."
Married? To me?
Hannah stopped in her tracks.
"Hey, you okay?"
"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Hey, look at that bird. It looks like a duck."
Did he just say marriage? She felt like all the air was sucked out of her lungs, and her heart skipped beats.
All she could feel was guilt.
How could she tell him that she was going to leave him even before he could get to college? How could she tell him that she couldn't be there with him when the college test scores came out? She couldn't be with him when he chose which university he was going to attend. She couldn't be with him to help him decorate his dorm room. She couldn't be there with him when he was stressed about his finals. She couldn't study with him in the library.
How could she tell him that she was going to leave him with all these memories that would stick with him for the rest of his life? She never imagined that she would be the reason why Victor would be so heartbroken and nonchalant in the future. She didn't know that she would be the reason why no one would have the chance to see his playful and happy side. She felt like she should have never come back to the past. She felt like she would have been better off loving him from a distance rather than hurting him in a way that would change him forever. Well, now it's too late for her to regret her choices, and all she has to do now is think of a way to tell Victor about this.
"I wish I could love you without the constant fear that my love might end up hurting you."
